So I just took a ‘what animal would you be?’ quiz from a site that I think is pretty reputable. I got…Stoat. Apparently if I die and am reincarnated into a another form, or an alien gives me gene therapy to allow me to turn into my inner animal, or a magical amulet gives me the power to shapeshift into another form…all of these would result in a stoat. Stoats are cute, but they’re not my first choice, and I don’t think they represent my inner being. Not WELL, anyway.
Still, it’s better than when I took the test again and gave very different answers: spider. Who wants to be a SPIDER? I have family in the Mornington pest control industry and they get rid of spiders for a living, sort of. I mean, most people want to get rid of termites and ants or whatever, but often spiders just get caught up in the mixture and it’s sad because they actually help a bit. But still, people don’t like them. How can my inner soul animal be a spider? People like me. They think I’m fine, at least. In that regard I think a stoat would be a suitable approximation. At least Melbourne’s pest control agents wouldn’t be chasing me, probably because I’m pretty sure we don’t have stoats in Australia, but also because they’re not pests. At least…I don’t think they are. I don’t know how you could exterminate something with that adorable little face.
Perhaps I need to find another animal test, one that actually reflects my true personality accurately. If I’m going to be reincarnated, I’d rather it not be into the body of a creature in the sights of some Dandenong pest control professionals. Like…a weasel.